You know...I don't normally like to put posts about me on here, mainly because that's not the purpose of this blog. I like to put my opinions, sure, but normal, day-to-day drama? That's the kind of stuff a teenager does. "Like, I told my BFF Katrina this and this and this today..."

But tonight I just want to write about a thing that's been bugging me--my lack of male attention.

It has been over a year since my ex and I broke up, and yes, I have had some attention. Some random customer at work asked me out, and a few guys give me those annoying ambiguous hugs. But...well, it's just hard to watch all my friends hooking up and finding great guys when it seems all the good ones pass me by.

It's hard, too, because I still don't know what went wrong with my ex.

I think the easy answer is the people he started hanging out with, but that's not all. He just...he got cruel. He was always cynical, but he just went off the deep end and had no sympathy for anyone. And that, combined with the people he hung out with, put me more in the mother mode. And you just can't stay with a guy when you're acting more like his mother than his girlfriend.

Was he always like that, and hid it from me for the almost-six months we dated? Or did he just get that way when we got to college? I just can't get over the guy he's become. I don't even see a trace of the guy I dated hiding underneath. They guy I dated is gone...and I miss him.

I guess that's why I'm so bothered. I want to know what would have happened if we hadn't changed. If he hadn't changed so much.

Anyways. Sorry to bore you.